Kids Meltdown and Acceptance

So we told the kids and the sparks flew!    We thought waiting to tell them rather than having them live through months of the roller coaster ride of job applications, interviews, and waiting and waiting and waiting…we thought that was the best decision, to wait to tell them.   Looking back I still think it was the right decision, but they have not had the opportunity to ease into the idea of moving like we have.   So it was a shock.   And the shock through the oldest, who will be a junior in high school next year, into a two day tail spin.   He didn’t go to school on Monday.   He was incredibly sad.    His track team posted heartbreaking words on his Facebook page insisting that he stay.   I rallied the troops of family (we skyped the super cousins that we’ll be moving close to), contacted teachers and counselors (they checked in on the boys during their school day), and even scheduled a visit to a trusted counselor.   The interesting thing was that the drive to the counselor’s office was the most cathartic piece of the boys’ two day tornado.   In the half hour car ride they shared their anger at us for keeping it from them, their sadness about saying good-bye to friends, their frustration about having to change so many of their summer and high school plans, questions about what to expect in the new place, and then the bargaining began.  Bargaining like, “So do you think we could wait to move another month so I can go to summer running camp?”, “When can we come back to visit and can my friends fly east to stay with us for some of the summer?”  and “If we move we’re gonna need better phones and a new computer to keep in touch with our old friends.”   That last request made me chuckle and know they were ok.   Because the moment my kids start to think about electronics and possessions, I know they’re back to their normal teen ways.   But seriously, though, it was the statement from my oldest that made me certain it truly was going to be ok:  “Mom, you know I’m pissed, but I get it.   I know why we’re moving, and I know it’s gonna work out.”    I am so grateful.

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